Dear Lady Members of the Police Force

                   
  Me in my concept for a new uniform...cool huh? My Ma made me take the cape off cause I'm not allowed to tie things around my neck 



Dear Lady Members of the Police Force



First off, let me say, yous don't sweat much for fat broads....also I want to hear your voices in the department even though.... like most men, I believe you broads invented language to satisfy your deep need to complain. ...about everything..all the time. If you want to succeed, remember the three golden rules ....If at first you don't succeed, redefine success. If it's stupid but works, it isn't stupid and remember, if life gives you lemons……stick the lemons down your shirt and make your boobs look bigger because, you know, some of yous can use all the help yous can get. That last ne isn’t really one of the three golden rules I just threw it in there. We only have two golden rules.....we did have three but there’s been some budget cuts so we had to let the third one go. For you girls who are new to the force let me remind you “There's no reason for it, it's just our policy.” keep saying that and you’ll keep us all out of trouble because when the pin is pulled, Mister PR gernade is not our friend, and remember when in doubt, poke it with a stick. If still in doubt empty your magazine into it.


Love ...(duh)
Chief Roarererer-er

The like secret diary of me, Chief Roaererer

You know, gosh darm it, sometimes I look around me and see all the paranoia, heartbreak and hatred and I think- my work here is done.

Like like super cool diary of police chief roarererer

   Me, undercover as a guy with a mustache, pretty sneaky huh? 

Dear secret like really cool diary 

I always meet with the new men on the force...you know, hit em up for a quick loan before they become alcholics and piss it all away...I also met them to give them what I call  my “New guy speech.” I call it that becuase I give it to all the new guys.  I say to them “New Guy....If we don't succeed, we run the risk of failure. Get married as soon as you can becuase  a bachelor's life is no life for a single man.  As for me, I’m not single, I'm romantically challenged.  Always rember, a bad plan is better than no plan....I mean, look how far it got me.  If it's stupid but works, it isn't stupid.  When filing reports, a little inaccuracy sometimes saves a ton of explanation.  If that doesn’t work, admit nothing, deny everything and make counter-accusations. ...most importently remember “He drove his car at me” it works everytime and lastly.... Every man has his price. Mine is $3,000 in cash.

The like really cool super secret diary of police chief roarerer=er=er=er

Dear Diary


My elbow is behind me, my ass in the middle of my arm


My elbow is behind me, my ass in the middle of my arm


My elbow is behind me, my ass in the middle of my arm


Okay got it.....and they say I don’t know my ass from my elbow


Say, good news! I’m planning to axed the bored of supervisors...that kinda like the guys who run apartment building except they let women do it too....for $1 million for an anti-missle device to secure the port of Baltimore.


You know, all the problems we face in our public persona, persona being a place in Italy or Mexico, I forget... can be traced to an unenlightened attitude of the people we have gunned down. The newspaper guy says I live in my own little world...yeah? And so what....they know me here. Hey you know what happened? Yesterday, I forgot to come back to work after lunch.


So I went to the racetrack in Charlestown....I was in the neighborhood.... I played a great horse. It took seven horses to beat him. I guess I should have known, that was the first time I saw a horse start from a kneeling position. Then I spotted him at the two dollar window betting on another horse in the same race. Half way through the race, my horse come sup to me and asks “Which way did they go?” He was so slow the jockey kept a diary of the trip. He was so late getting home, he tiptoed into the stable.

Police misconduct November 28 through December 1

Its time to have a national conversation about the national police problem

"Fairfax County Police, where having punk attitude will get you promoted"

Rape/Sexual assault

Los Angeles County California has settled a lawsuit for $245,000 to a woman who claims that a deputy groped her breasts during a traffic stop then ordered her to let him follow her to her home where he then raped her in the driveway. That deputy is now facing trial over similar allegations by two other women.

A Benzie County Michigan deputy accepted a plea deal to an assault charge for pulling a woman over on three different occasions and groping her each time.

A Hillsborough County Florida sheriff’s lieutenant has been suspended for one month without pay for sexually harassing a subordinate officer who he allegedly called into his office and frisked after accusing her of having contraband, then attempting to grab her breasts and kiss her after demanding she lift her bra. A review board recommended a demotion but the sheriff disagreed.

Police misconduct round up November 28 through December 1

                  "Fairfax County Police, where having punk attitude will get you promoted"

Its time to have a national conversation about the national police problem

Murder /attempted murder/manslaughter

A Colfax Louisiana cop has been sentenced to five years of hard labor after he pled guilty to manslaughter for fatally shooting a man after chasing him.

A New York NY cop who was assigned to the mayor’s security detail has been charged with attempted murder for shooting his girlfriend’s unarmed ex-boyfriend during an alleged altercation while the man was apparently running away.

A Houston Texas cop is the subject of a lawsuit filed by the family of an elderly couple who died when their car was t-boned by that officer while he was responding to a call without his lights or siren activated.

A Sacramento County CA deputy has been sentenced to life without the possibility of parole for arranging the murder of a corrections officer who he believed was having an affair with his wife.

A San Antonio TX cop has been found guilty of aggravated assault and manslaughter over an 100mph crash that killed a fellow officer who was picking up road flares and injured another motorist. The officer was apparently speeding without his emergency lights or siren activated.

A Humboldt Tennessee cop has been found guilty of reckless homicide for shooting an unarmed man in the back while he was on his knees. The officer claimed it was an accident caused by him slipping while he was holstering his gun.

A Palm Beach County Florida deputy is the subject of a lawsuit filed by the mother of a man who was unarmed when he was shot to death by a deputy who claims he thought the man was reaching for something at his waist when he was being detained on allegations that he stole his mother’s car.

A San Antonio Texas cop has been sentenced to 15 years on aggravated assault & manslaughter charges for killing a fellow officer who was picking up road flares and injuring another motorist in a 100mph crash caused while he was speeding to a call without lights or siren activated.

A New Orleans Louisiana cop has been sentenced to 8 years in prison for his role in the Danziger Bridge shooting incident and subsequent cover-up. The officer took a plea deal in exchange for his testimony.

Kids and Cops...Run children! Run!

A Montgomery County Maryland cop has been placed on desk duty after a protection order was issued against him on allegations that he threatened his 4-year-old daughter with a taser.

A Belton South Carolina cop has received a suspended sentence with one year of home detention for kidnapping his girlfriend during a dispute.

A McKenzie TN cop has been fired after an investigation into an alleged relationship he had with an underage girl. He may face criminal charges over the allegations.

A Maine State trooper has been suspended after he was charged with witness tampering and unlawful sexual contact with a child.

A New York State Unified Court System cop has been arrested on multiple misdemeanor charges including child endangerment, menacing, and unlawful imprisonment after an armed standoff with police his estranged wife.

A Lee County Florida deputy has been fired after admitting that he repeatedly used his taser on family members and others including his teen daughter and her boyfriend.

A Prince George’s County Maryland cop has been suspended while under investigation over inappropriate text messages he allegedly sent to a 19-year-old woman minutes after leaving her apartment where he took a report related to the theft of her wallet.

The Birmingham Alabama police department, Birmingham school district, and several school resource officers are the subject of a lawsuit alleging that there is a practice of unnecessary use of pepperspray on students even when the students pose no threat to others and sometimes after they’ve been restrained. Six students are involved in the suit but there may be plans to turn it into a class action suit.