Fairfax County Police Hire Two Officers to Outreach to County Asian Community

Today Fairfax County Police Chief Rohereerer-er er released the following statment:


“I can’t find my socks”


He also said: “We got a lot of short yellowish colored people here in the county....see? That’s why over 80% of the force lives outside the county....but anyway,o we figured we should be able to communicate with them , so we were gonna hire one of them real ese-y types, you know, like Chinese-Japanese-Vietnams- Congolese, you know, all those guys, but everyone we interviewed we didn’t like because they were all Asian, so somebody goes “You know the Moskowitz twins are looking for work” and I go “Holy shit ! Why didn’t I think at that!” You know, those two could put oreck vacuum out of business, if you know what I mean, so it would be nice to have them around....if you know what I mean.....I was winking when I said that...except I’m writing so you couldn’t see that so that’s why I told you.....so, anyway, they start Tuesday”